My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
