Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Randomize
