I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
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