Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
that may or may not have been my penis.
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