google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
