forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize
