Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
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