he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
