): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
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