I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
