his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
