1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize