Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
