Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
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