Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
