No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
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