I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
whose parrot is this?
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize