No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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