Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
