people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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