I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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