Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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