I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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