i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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