it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
