you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
