did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize