i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
