I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
