Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
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