Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
Randomize