i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
