I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
