I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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