Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
