well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
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