the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Randomize
