So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
