is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
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