Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize