She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
