I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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