I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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