So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
