That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
