I heard we made out
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
