I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
Randomize
