hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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