Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
