did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
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