I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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