So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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